J & J’s Secret “Success” Sauce…

We’re gonna go out on a BOLD limb (one supported in conversational substance — more on that in a second) by telling you what we think still perplexes you.

You know… the annoying things you scratch your head at… or… the repeating stuff that you want an almost immediate solution for.

Well, hey, “things” and “stuff”… it seems we’ve just about covered ourselves, when predicting our seer-like knowledge about your pet peeves, with those two ever-so specific words (yeah, right).

The human condition, sometimes, seems so involved —  so complicated in facts and figures, and inundated with analysis of life (the inner parts we study, like metaphysics, and the outer parts we attempt to grow, like finances, friends, and cool, fun experiences) that we forget that its foundation is still quite SIMPLE.

Over the last 3 months, we’ve had the opportunity of connecting with over 300 fascinating individuals from the LWL community. 30 to 45-minute consultations about anything under the sun… you name it: relationships, politics, weather, careers, business, money, love, travel, ideas, etc…

Through these varied conversations — all beautiful in their own right — we’ve come to find a few simple TRUTHS…

…. and several insights — some of which you may already know about (’cause, well, ya’re wrestling with it, baby).

In no way are we suggesting that these are absolute, or that we’ve got a monopoly on ’em. Nevertheless, when one is in the game long enough (meeting with, interviewing and hearing about others in the game, studying human dynamics, and listening to and/or reading about all the different “gurus” of the moment), one starts to notice things.

What’ve we noticed?

Click the continue reading link to find out…

We’ve noticed:

> You’re beginning to wonder why people, in some circles, assume that they have to fix themselves completely before they’ll ever be “somebody”.

Being in permanent student status (where someone always puts their dreams on hold because they always feel they have more to learn), you now realize, isn’t that smart.

> You’re beginning to question the folks around you who feel “enlightenment by association” (following around one “feel-good” mentor from seminar to seminar like a groupie) is the equivalent of their “easy street” to inner peace.

You’re stepping up to the accountability plate and ensuring your close friends and associates understand that just because they put “Namaste” or “In love and light” above their name, that doesn’t guarantee consistent RESULTS as a conscious manifestor. A few key “things” (there’s that word again) DO though (keep reading).

> You’ve come to understand how there are other essential (oftentimes more powerful) laws that govern your ability to learn, grow, and develop in THIS physical world.

While the Law of Attraction has had its 15 minutes of fame, you’re watching in fascination as more and more astute teachers are taking it off its totem pole and talking about things like: “divergence” and “perfect counterpart” — as in good-evil, light-dark, hot-cold, and so on — or also known as The Law of Duality (it’s important, study this law).

> You’re in information overload and, because of the proliferation of income-opportunity offers that hit your inbox, you feel “there are just too, too many darn ways to earn money… how do I choose?”

Yep, we hear you. It’s almost unbearable.

“Do I start online?” “… website needed?” “What do I sell or promote… create my own product, do affiliate marketing, or buy resell rights?” “Ebay, newsletters, list building, PPC advertising, joint ventures?” I yi, yi… the possibilities never stop.

Business is business (the basic foundational rules haven’t changed, regardless how some Internet mavericks have purported otherwise) and as one of the J’s we’re about to introduce you to once said, “… avoid anything and anyone who offers you their shortcut to success. Because, if it won’t take two to five years to build, it’s not a business, it’s a game — and one you’re bound to lose.

And, believe us, the mentor who said this isn’t all that cynical, either. He’s quite the optimistic, open-minded, super human being who’s accomplished a lot, and provided (and still is providing) VALUE in extreme doses.

Speaking of that….

> You’re not that fascinated anymore by trading time for money or trying to build wealth in a non-leveraged way because, well, guess what… you know to do it this way means it’s going to be at the expense of you enjoying (experiencing) a life.

You intellectually KNOW that “money” is a medium of exchange, nothing more and nothing less. There’s no magic way to acquire it without value (i.e., wealth can’t come, and never will come, BEFORE “value”).

You become wealthy (generate value) by starting with this question:

“What am I most talented at and passionate about? And, once I know this answer, how can I use this to solve a problem or add value to a group of people?”

Again, every one — yes, EVERY one — of the millionaires we’ve met and know have had to ask themselves this question and find an answer within.

Other than investing money to earn money, the most powerful and sustained way we know to BUILD (and enjoy pretty quickly) LEVERAGED-wealth is to teach what you know (your life skills, business knowledge, personal experiences, etc.) while guiding, mentoring, and coaching SELECT people in a business that rewards passive, royalty income for the CONSUMPTION of an exclusive, cutting-edge repeat-type product or service.

In a few days, Barry will be releasing another blog post titled: “Network, Teach, and Grow Rich,” which will cover this in detail.

> You’re sick and tired of certain online personalities showing videos of themselves driving around in cars, telling you how great they are, and how much money they create.

Yeah, yeah, we know, the HYPE is getting ridiculous, and you’re beginning to wonder if there’s anybody left in the entrepreneurial world who’s too darn busy working their business to care about being famous anymore.

You wonder, with just a glimmer of hope and faith, “Truly, is there anyone out there, who understands how to build residual income, while keeping things REAL and being more interested in me, and my ongoing consistent success in ONE business, than in pushing me product after product?”

Slam-bam-thank-ya-ma’am…. you hate that quick “love you and leave you” mindset that’s so easy to perform these days online (a place that, yep, let’s be real, DOES make it easy to put a personal connection with a prospective business partner on the backburner) and you sure as hell aren’t going to be THAT person to others.

So, who are these the two J’s that we look up to and respect for their long-standing ability to take a “people first, lifestyle/opportunity second, product last” approach to your success (you’ll understand why this order is so, so important in Barry’s upcoming blog post).

The first is a person Barry has admired for more than 15 years from afar, and once an unmet hero and mentor of his — a man of integrity and leadership that he now considers a new friend.

John Milton Fogg has, for more than 20 years, been been an editor, writer, speaker and coach. He authored The Greatest Networker in the World, which, having sold more than a million copies around the world, is one of the highest-ever selling network marketing titles. Some people call it a “classic”. Barry calls it a “masterpiece” (more on that in another upcoming blog post).

The second is a person Heather has had the pleasure of interviewing several times and getting to know, through some very powerful one-on-one dialoguing about how to live a happier, healthier and wealthier life.

Dr. Joe Rubino is an acclaimed MLM and personal-development trainer, life-changing success-coach and author of 11 best-selling books and audios available in 19 languages. He is the CEO of a life-impacting leadership-development company, The Center for Personal Transformation, and the creator of the acclaimed audio album and workbook, “10 Weeks to Network Marketing Success: The Secrets to Launching Your Very Own Million-Dollar Organization In a 10-Week Business-Building and Personal-Development Self-Study Course.”

The cool part is this:

Both of these seasoned industry LEADERS also know and respect each other. They’re friends, associates, and have a very similarly-connected SECRET that they feel is the foundational ingredient that dictates what we can and can’t — or will or won’t — achieve in this lifetime!

What’s the one or two “things” that, after 50+ years of collective study into the minds of super-achievers, they’ve pinned down as the “secret sauce” for super-success?

It is skills?  Talent?  Ambition?  Drive and determination?

Partly… but what dictates exactly what our skills, talent, and level of ambition and determination are?

John Fogg is adamant that it comes from our beliefs.

Can you walk across hot coals that are so high in temperature they’d fry an egg in seconds?

Well, that depends on what you believe.  Many people have done it without feeling the slightest bit of warmth, or ending up with any kind of mark on their skin.

Others have jumped off in pain with the mark of their efforts branded on the soles of their feet.


It’s like Henry Ford said… “whether you believe you can… or you can’t… you’re right.

As John says, nothing more adequately illustrates how beliefs are the bottom line for all human beings.

He says:

“Our fundamental beliefs are just like the Operating System in our computers. They control and direct all of our hardware and software from the auto-pilot functioning of our vital organs, to the movements of our hands, fingers and feet to the complex thinking and the emotional feelings we experience every minute of every day of our waking and sleeping lives. Problem is, this Operating System is 20, 30, 40 or more years old… and it was made up in the mind of a child (of four, five or six…) and most likely, a disappointed or dissatisfied, discouraged and disheartened little “programmer” trying desperately to safely navigate the stormy seas of life and protect him or herself from pain.”

John learned from his research with BeliefBusters that beliefs come in two (and only two) flavors: unwanted, self-sabotaging beliefs that limit you and even stop you from achieving what you desire, dream of and deserve… and empowering beliefs that serve and inspire you to success and accomplishment in all domains of life and work.

Want to know what your beliefs are? Look at your life. Don’t like what you see? Change your beliefs. It’s the only way.

Our limiting beliefs can have a huge effect on our lives.  And it’s not just about walking on hot coals, although that certainly can be a powerful illustration of the truth… but it’s about every aspect of the life you lead.

Dr. Joe Rubino talks about self-esteem being the #1 ingredient for success and happiness, and how 85% of the population is lacking in self-esteem in one or more areas of their lives (physical health, occupation, finances, relationships and family, spiritual and personal development, or fun and recreation).

And where do you think your level of self-esteem comes from?

That’s right, it comes from your core beliefs.

Unfortunately, as John also pointed out, most of our beliefs were formed when we were very young children, before we had the mental capacity to filter out what we were being told and ask ourselves if it really made sense.

Hence, we believe we can’t draw… simply because our older sibling told us so.

We believe we can’t write… just because one teacher made one off-handed remark about our poor grammar skills.

We believe we can’t sing… because the choirmaster told us to just move our lips and not make a sound, so we wouldn’t throw off the other kids.

We believe we can’t dance… because nobody ever asked us to.

We believe we’re repulsive… because the other kids call us names (is there anybody they DON’T call names?)

We believe we don’t deserve wealth… because our parents told us that money doesn’t grow on trees.

And it goes on and on and on, with some beliefs being far more irrational, or far more life-impacting, than others.

And that’s how we end up with low self-esteem, or low self-worth.

That’s a bad place to find ourselves, because if WE don’t believe in our own worth, who the heck will?

Of course, some people confuse self-esteem with ego, and try to condemn it as a bad thing.  But in fact, as Joe Rubino explains it, people with high self-esteem want to help others to be their best, too; people with big ego problems only care about themselves — for better or worse.

In fact, often those with the biggest ego are the ones trying to hide how low their self-worth really is.  They figure prancing around like a peacock and putting on a show will take the attention off the fact that they really feel like an ugly duckling underneath it all.

Now, hey, that’s not to say there’s anything wrong with “acting as if” (follow that link for Heather’s personal account of using this principle); in fact, one way to change your beliefs and prove to yourself how ridiculous they are in the first place is to “fake it ’till you make it”, or live the life you WANT to have before you have it (otherwise known as the be-do-have principle).

But the “act”, or the “faking”, needs to come from a place of sincerity, and concern for the greater good; a place where we add value to others and feel good about it, not a place where we’re just trying to shout, “look at me! I’m special!”

And self-esteem is not just about believing in our own worth; it impacts every area of our lives, including our communication with others, the richness of our relationships, our personal effectiveness, the level of success, happiness and fulfillment we achieve, and our ability to manifest what we want… all of which rely heavily on how we feel about ourselves.

So what’s the best way to remove our limiting beliefs and move forward with high self-esteem?

According to Dr Joe, there’s really three steps, and they revolve around the past, present and future.  Here’s how we paraphrase what he teaches:

1. PAST: Find out where your lack of self-esteem comes from, and stop the downward spiral that’s keeping you there.  Re-frame any upsetting events of your childhood in a way that involves forgiveness, empathy and gratitude.  Understand that other people act the only way they know how, and that while these events may have caused you to make a decision about yourself, you can now make a different decision:  to be grateful for your strengths instead of focusing on your weaknesses, or to forgive someone who hurt you rather than be resentful.

2. PRESENT: Evaluate what’s working in your life, and what isn’t.  What would honor your values and inspire you to be passionate?  What would you like to be doing instead of what you’re doing now?  Highlight your strengths and work on improving in areas that you find lacking.  Replace negative messages from the past with new core beliefs that support your happiness and level of excellence.

3. FUTURE: Design the reality you want to create, including a new self-image that supports how magnificent you truly are.  Get rid of that gloomy state of low self-esteem, and any self-pity or victimitis-thinking that no longer supports you.  Create a vision for who you are, how you want to be known, how you’ll spend your days, what you’ll have, where you’ll live, who you’ll live with, who you’ll serve and contribute to, and what gifts you’d like to manifest (remember, the gifts you think you don’t have are only missing because you believe they are).

So the bottom line is, you can’t re-create the past.  It’s done and over with, and provided you with a lot of lessons that you hopefully learned from.

But the past doesn’t need to dictate how you live today, or how you’re going to live tomorrow.

What’s stopping you from achieving everything you want?

The only thing that CAN stop you is the belief that you can’t do it, shouldn’t have it, or don’t deserve it.


If you can conceive it, believe it — and know you DESERVE it — then you can achieve it.

In a few days, courtesy of John Milton’s Fogg’s business model for leveraged wealth, Barry will show you how to build a “Shipping and Receiving Business” (that’s a play on words) and earn an absolute fortune (as in walkaway, self-perpetuating, passive income) and retire, if you like, AFTER 24 to 36 months of hard work.

Your Partners in the Quest For
Living a Life Without Limits,

Barry and Heather

Look at your life right now…

That’s what you have believed up till now.

Don’t like what you’ve got?

Change your beliefs.

John is adamant about saying: “It’s the only way.”

BeliefBusters is a 13-week (three months) iCourse of weekly Lessons you get as download links in your email. It’s priced at $47 a month (again for three months), because he knew that the people who needed it most could afford it least. Just about anybody can do 47 bucks. And to have people feel comfortable, John guarantees the results or your money-back.

Belief Busters AccessJohn likes to say that BeliefBusters is MP3 for him: His Pleasure, Passion and Purpose.

You know the truth of The Law of Attraction, that “Whatever the mind can conceive and believe it ALWAYS achieves” and “You will achieve ONLY what you believe”— for good, bad or indifferent.

BeliefBusters takes you step-by-step from knowledge to understanding and then leads through you a simple daily process, which over time—a very short time—transforms unwanted self–sabotaging beliefs to empowering beliefs that assure your success… fast, in a proven way that lasts.

If that interests or excites you, go here to learn more, and if it’s a fit for you to do now, sign up and on at: http://BeliefBusters.com

Filed under: Coaching / Mentoring, Online / Passive Income, Personal Achievement, Prosperity Mind / Wealth Creation

10 Responses to “J & J’s Secret “Success” Sauce…”

  1. Many thanks for this post. As one of the 85% (I’m sure its a higher percentage than that!!) who have struggled with low self esteem most of my life, I recognise it as a HUGE hurdle. Not insurmountable however. I think though that it might be one of the life lessons that many of us are here to learn – how to love ourselves unconditionally.
    I was aware of this when my son was born and have been very careful to constantly focus on positive experiences and show him how loved and worthy he is, but from the age of four his experiences in mainstream schools taught him otherwise. Since he was 12 I have homeschooled him. Now at 15 he still doubts himself and battles low self esteem but is improving steadily. Thank you for the confirmation that the reasons I took him out of school were well founded and that what we are working on together is right. I know he is on the path to realising his dreams and truly living a life without limits – as am I.
    Best wishes to you both.

  2. Barry and Heather,

    Your insights are priceless. I found them to be very true, in my own experience and thoughts. So well assembled for all to read. Thank you.

    A business takes time and work to build and create. And nuture. Promises of ease and little or no work are really “come ons” that disappoint, discourage, and end in failure.

    I too am tired of the “flaunting” of symbols of success without revealing the meat (and guts) of what it really took to get there. I also am tired of the down and out stories followed by what almost appears to be miraculous and instant success, without substance. Does one have to fail first to know that success is possible? Goes back to beliefs, doesn’t it?

    Thank you for your posting. You have earned my respect with your history and substance and wisdom.

  3. You seem to ‘dismiss’ the “Laws of Universal Attraction” as if it, it content, is (was?) a passing, popularized gimmick-like the ‘inner child’ popularity of the 90’s. The reality is that the concept that you create your own reality based on your “true” beliefs has been known since the beginning of mankind. The difference is that our beginning generations knew this inately because they were spiritually connected to their environment and social setting. There was no need for labels, and it was not considered somehow an ‘outside’ aspect-the concept of Dualism.
    This “Dualistic Thinking” didn’t happen, in my opinion, out of any Natural condition. Too me, it was a contrived system that was established to put in people’s minds that there was a Hierachy of society and Spirituality. This started even before our concept of History, that, in reality, only encompasses the last 10,000 years. The ‘Golden Age of Greece”, The Pharohs of Egypt’, the Ceasars of Rome could not exist without the philosophy of Dualism. It exists Today in the form of “Politics”
    Perhaps the cruelest implmentation of ths has been in all the Religions of the World. “God” is ‘in Heavan’ and the only way to connect is through these contrived Religions. Add to this the Socializing of Mankind, and it becomes totally Logical and Rational that most people Don’t believe that they are EXACTLY were they are soupposed to be based on this disconnect of man with his true (Spiritual) self, and Society as a whole; that man lives in a perpetual State of Denial.
    That, to me, is why Man is discontent with themselves and their Environment (Physical, Mental, and Spriitual). I am no exception. I “believed” I was Defective, a Misfit, and that an essential Part of Me was missing, and trying to hide that fact from others. This “Hole” I felt lead me down many ‘Roads to Enlightenment’, always thinking my Happiness was somehow Outside of me. “If I only could-get,buy,own,achieve-certain Things, I would feel whole. It was during this Quest for the True Reality of the World that I learned that “God” is Nuetral, and will provide you anything that you truly Believed. Good, Bad, Right, Wrong are Mankind contrivances, and that we Truly are responsible for where we end-up in life.
    The problem is, that KNOWING this changes nothing!! Why? Because there is still the inference that this is Outside looking in, rather than the reverse. Dualism cannot be eliminated by Analizing it. The further you try to ‘figure-it-out’, the further it will move away from you.
    And there is where I believe, the failure(my words) of the concept of the “Law of Universal Attraction” was doomed to be labled a ‘Passing Fad’. Some people have started to recognize this, and realize that it can’t be taught at a Conscience Level, It needs to been impemented at a Spritual level- or, at least, some level of ‘Pre-conscienceness’. Even writing this is an act of Futility. These “Laws” Work whether you believe them or not. If you want know a Person’s “True Beliefs” look at their lives.

  4. Hi Rhoda,

    You asked, “Does one have to fail first to know that success is possible?” And while I’d like to say no, I have interviewed far too many people who have said that, a VAST majority of the time, failure is what is required in order to propel someone to WANT to succeed — and, of course, that desire is really key.

    Some failures, of course, are bigger than others, and some people need a bigger kick in the pants than others.

    And Jerold…

    You say “You seem to ‘dismiss’ the “Laws of Universal Attraction” as if it, it content, is (was?) a passing, popularized gimmick-like the ‘inner child’ popularity of the 90’s”.

    No, not at all… despite the wordiness and confusion in your sentence (and your comment), I’m pretty sure I grasp the gist of what you’re trying to say. And I’m not sure how you deduced that, but the fact is that it got a lot of press that other, and equally important, universal laws did not. Now people are realizing that there’s more to success than the LOA, just as they realized in the past that there’s more to success than positive thinking, more to visualization than seeing pictures, and more to affirmations than saying words.

    I’m also not sure where you got your theory that people invented the law of duality, and that there’s no basis in nature.

    Show me a mountain without a valley. Show me a front without a back. Show me an up without a down.

    Nobody can conceive of “light” without experiencing “dark”. Nobody can understand “hot” without experiencing “cold”.

    The law of duality talks about the opposites that are part of the universe, and unfortunately, you can’t change that by trying to explain it away or insisting it does not.

    And yet, your final two sentences agree 100% with what was written in our post, so that’s a study in the law of duality in itself… “agreement” and “disagreement” co-existing within one entity, just as a mountain is peacefully located next to a valley, and a back is perfectly nestled behind a front.


  5. Thank you; great post.
    I have read a few of Dr. Joe’s books and I agree with you : this is a man full of heart, you can trust and who is dedicated to help other people grow and reach their own success. He really cares about others and takes time for it.
    Thank you also for all your other posts!
    Denis Sabardine

  6. Thank you Berry and Heather
    It is very rarely that I continue to read an article that long and you can guess it.
    I was captivated by the wisdom that you two displayed
    As a person that went on the red hot coals in the past and that person, me of course that did not manifest his ideas and dreams can attest.
    You hit it on the nail, it is lack of self esteem.
    I have been a teacher for quite a few years and I did not take care of my own lack of self esteem
    Thank you angels for your precious words
    with love and light

  7. Oh my! I’ve gotta’ get my mom to read this. (My kids won’t 🙂

    So, thank you! Thank you! AND, for the pleasure of Ms. Vale and the rest of your readers, when they go to BeliefBusters with your liink above, they can sign up for the BeliefBusters free online weekly Report (puppy takes me hours! each week to do, so… it’s useful and valuable you can trust).

    This week’s (out tomorrow) is totally devoted to dr. Joe Rubino (Did you know he is my personal and business coach? True, too). There’s a quote, an article from his The Self-Esteem Book AND an hour-ish long interview I did with Joe from The MasterMind Sessions you ain’t gettin’ anywhere else (unless you drop $279 for a subscription) so…

    Give, give, give… 🙂

    Again, my thanks. Get the Report (it’s good stuff) and enjoy the good Dr. (and he is THE good Dr.)

    I appreciate you.

    Proud Mrs. Fogg’s little boy

  8. Heather.
    I apologize for my ‘wordiness’. I was in a hurry and didn’t re-read my comments. My point was that I DID agree with you. I think your example of the computer, and its “operating system” was very accurate. And, that was the point I “wordily’ was trying to make; that basically everyone in the Day and Age has a ‘dysfunctional’ operating system.
    As to “dualism”. To me, dualism is two separate and exclusive ideas or philosophies that can never totally co-exist. In my study of Macrobiotic Philosophy, the relationship to Yin and Yang is about “complimentary opposites”. Yin cannot exist without its Yang counterpart. To talk about valleys being defined by the Mountains is a perfect example of that. You could just as logically say that Mountains cannot exist without Valleys. Take away one, and the other ceases to exist. In Dualism, One ‘reality’ is not complimented by the other. They exist separately, thus the ‘Dual” nature of the matter.
    As I said, I find your viewpoints to be very insightful. I would never write a “rebuttal” to anybodies viewpoint. That would be Egotistical and Self-centered in the extreme. My apologies if that is what my feedback seemed to imply

  9. Hi Heather and Barry…

    In your e-mail you warned us this is going to be a long blog post… and you were correct in both sense — it was long but bloody hell it was well worth a read!

    I agree with John that belief is at the core of everything we do, achieve or not achieve in our life. And our beliefs certainly do shape our self-esteem which in turn shapes our actions and so it goes on.

    The belief bit struck such a nerve — this week I’ve been working on determining where a couple of my limiting beliefs originated from… and yes, most of them were from comments made to me or I incorrectly thought were directed to me by others when I was very young. It’s been an interesting journey isolating the origins… and it’s been freeing because I’ve been able to let the very real comments which were said to me go.

    So thank you!


  10. Great post guys. For anyone interested, Alan Tutt has written a very powerful book about the power of beliefs called Choose to believe. Working with his theories and insights, I have acheived very good results. Notice I am not saying quick ones. Just finding underlying beliefs can take some time. I do NOT believe however that quick fixes can cut it.

    Here is an exemple of what I’m talking about: I come from a French Canadian military family and so, I learned French and English when I learned to speak. To me, learning a language simply intails gettin another word to say something. I dd not realize that this was a beleif until my sister, who was born a year before my dad retired and, therefore, only learned French. She had friends a couple of years older than her in school who were having a hell of a time learning English and so, her beleif was, if you’re not born into it, it is VERY difficult to learn a language. She now lives in Ontario and was having a very difficult time ajusting to the language. We worked toghether for 2 weeks on her belief last August and, guess what, she started even dreamin in English. She already knew the words, she could function in an English environement but her belief was preventing her from BEING a person who could function in an English environement.
    Here is my take on life : See yourself as a perfect individualized spirit having a human physical experience, accept each moment of your life the exact way that it is (thus avoiding resistance) and when something goes wrong, look at your beleifs and transform any limiting ones into usable forward moving ones (many teachers have many techniques for doing this, find the one that suits you).

    I would like to thank you guys for all the sharing and the value you add to my life with each action and information you bring to the human community. I love you for it and I appreciate it very much.


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